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teacakes:

OH, DAMN… IT’S NOTHING! IT’S STUPID! YOU KNOW THOSE BLACK SHOES? I TOLD YOU IT WAS STUPID. I BOUGHT THIS BLACK DRESS TO GO WITH THOSE BLACK SHOES, WHICH I FORGOT TO PACK. I HAVE 6 OTHER PAIR OF SHOES, 2 OF WHICH ARE RUNNING SHOES IN CASE YOU’RE UP FOR A LITTLE GAME LATER. AND NOW I’M DOUBLY SCREWED BECAUSE I HAVE 2 BLACK DRESSES AND NO BLACK SHOES. I KNOW WHAT YOU’RE THINKING, “WHO CARES WHAT COLOR SHOES SHE’S WEARING?” BUT BELIEVE ME, WOMEN NOTICE.

christareiss:

so you wanna be a master

christareiss:

so you wanna be a master

thundercrumbs:

obesealpaca:

do you think he knows

DOCTOR FISHER GET OFF THAT MANS FACE YOU’RE A SCIENTIST NOW ACT LIKE ONE

thundercrumbs:

obesealpaca:

do you think he knows

DOCTOR FISHER GET OFF THAT MANS FACE YOU’RE A SCIENTIST NOW ACT LIKE ONE

mikeerrico:

It gets better.

mikeerrico:

It gets better.

spermbanker:

u know when u cold n ur nipnops go hard. why my titty betray me

prekslut:

internet slang meanings:

  • smh: sorry me horny
  • wtf: want to frick?
  • tbh: touch boner, honey
  • lmao: lets masturbate all over
  • lol: lick on labia
  • omfg: obama may fuck golfers
  • rotfl: rub on tip faster, lady
  • wbu: wild boobies unleashed
  • fyi: fuck yeah incest
  • jw: juicy wang
  • yolo: you only love oral

ke$ha starts a cat cult

saaywhaaaaaaaaaat:

So I was on itunes…

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